Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Humor me....

 Ten thoughts for 2006....

Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted

Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny.  If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather.  It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: We know exactly where one cow with 'mad cow disease' is located among the millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located.  

Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

Cat   :)


onecrazymomto5 said...

Oh dear god #1 was hilarious!!!!  #8 is sooo true!!  He He #6!!  #2 is right on the money!!  Those must have been the good ole days!!

stupidsheetguy said...

I have returned, to darken your doors. And I like the first entry I got to! I love this kind of humor, LOL.   Number 9...perfect.


redbaranjj said...

Oh yeah...these are great!


quartrlyfecrysis said...

love number 8 ;)~ gee i'm hungry.


sarajanesmiles said...

Lol, No. 7 is my favourite!!
Sara   x

gaboatman said...

I loved this, it's hilarious and hits pretty close to home at the same time!  Hope all is well, my favorite Kitty!

nighterror5 said...

hehe LOL @ #1

I agree with you